Над моим сыном смеются в саду и говорят, что он не мужчина или что он как девчонка, потому что он постоянно плачет. Как только что-то идёт не так — обидное слово, не позвали играть и т. д. — сразу слезы и истерика; может и начать капризничать. Я уже не знаю, как с этим бороться. Переживаю, что в школе будет ещё хуже, знаю, какие дети сейчас жестокие. У кого есть старшие братья-парни, как вы справляетесь, или это всё пройдет с возрастом?
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Elena
Well, at around six and a half years old, this is really strange. Crying and flopping on the floor would warrant a visit to a neurologist.
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Kristina
It's unpleasant (((
Mine, too, sometimes sheds a tear (((
This year, in first grade, he seems to have become more restrained.
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Reznik Vera
At age 6, this kind of behavior is strange, especially if they fall to the floor; either something you're doing is off, or there may be developmental problems. This is not normal for a 3-year-old—please consult a child psychologist.
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Samsonova Anya
It seems odd at such an age to have a meltdown and lie on the floor—maybe something's wrong with my nervous system?
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Tanya
Elena We went to a neurologist.
There was an assessment when the child was six; I told her all my concerns.
Her reply was that everything was fine, and that the child is normal.
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Anastasiya
There are some very sensitive and emotional children. But rolling on the floor and throwing tantrums is normal for a 3-year-old; by age 6, this should be addressed—it's not normal.
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Natalya
So what's he like... think about it.
It's really strange.
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Tanya
Samsonova Anya I don't even know. We had a neurology consultation at 6, and I told her about all my concerns. Her reply was that everything is fine.
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Tanya
Reznik Vera If only we could find someone who is also competent.
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Tanya
Anastasiya Are you seeing a psychologist?
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Verunchik
My son is the same way... this is rough. At first I didn't tell him, but now I tell him that people will laugh at him and tease him if he behaves like this. He can throw a tantrum in front of his friends, tears, a runny nose, and nothing fazes him. But fortunately no one teases him, apparently... well, he hasn't told me... I worried about this too, especially now that he's started first grade. My daughters aren't that tearful. There's probably nothing you can do about it; you just have to wait until he outgrows it—that's just his temperament.
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Tanya
Natalya Do you think the problem is with the family?
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Tanya
Verunchik Well, in the comments below, people are saying he has some problems... I honestly don't know what to think.
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Elena
Elena Finding a competent neurologist is important; lying on the floor and crying is not normal, especially in the presence of other children.
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Agapova Inna
Я вообще ни разу не поддерживаю гендерные стереотипы, не считаю, что мальчикам нельзя плакать и т.п. Но если он реально валяется в истерике на полу из-за того что его не позвали играть, то в школе будет фаталити, так как провоцировать его не будет только ленивый. Как-то надо заниматься эмоционально-волевой сферой, к нейропсихологу походить, на спорт.
Natalya
Natalya It's not certain that it's only within the family.
They soak up everything everywhere, like sponges.
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Tanya
We don't have that in our family. Of course I am kinder and more affectionate because I am a mother. His father raises him differently, but it doesn't seem to be making any difference.
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Tanya
Agapova Inna Yes, I understand that crying is normal for everyone, including boys.
But not to the extent that he does.
Every day there’s a meltdown when his husband comes to pick him up; he literally lies on the floor in the changing room because he doesn’t want to go home, and they come earlier than usual to pick him up.
His husband is barely holding it together and said that I should go after him myself.
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Tanya
Natalya Well, I suppose it rubbed off on me too, because I have exactly the same temperament.
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Natalya
Natalya Well, there you have it—the conclusion we've reached.\nPlease talk to him.\nHe will likely be teased a lot throughout his life.
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Samsonova Anya
Samsonova Anya Let him see another person as well—really, this isn’t normal. For a 3-year-old it might be okay, but not for someone who’s almost 7.
Or perhaps he is spoiled by you and has learned to get everything by throwing tantrums?
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Agapova Inna
Agapova Inna There is no magic pill, after all, so psycho-pedagogical work is essential. And sport as well — I believe that systematic and targeted physical activity is vital for children.
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Arina
Not at all. He should figure it out on his own.
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Tanya
Samsonova Anya No, not really. Everything in moderation — there's no spoiling.
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Tanya
Agapova Inna Thank you for the advice.
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★☆Zvezdochka★☆
What a gentle guy, then. Maybe he'll grow out of it.
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Reznik Vera
Reznik Vera Available online
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Anastasiya
Anastasiya Perhaps.
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zata fata
Tanya Hello, why doesn't the child want to go home?
This is a protective reaction.
He protects himself this way.
Is the home environment normal?
Emotionally?
Are you not yelling at him or at each other?
Is the father the biological father or a stepfather?
If he is not the biological father - he may harass the child and threaten that, for example, he will kill you if the child tells you; there are different cases.
Obviously this is not normal and there is some danger in the home, since he doesn't want to return there.
For a child, the most important thing is a safe home (without emotional or physical violence) and safe, stable parents.
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Maryana
Tanya He's just a spoiled, capricious person.
He has learned that he can get what he wants by throwing tantrums, and now he does whatever he wants.
I would have backhanded my own child for such behavior when he was six, especially since he's a boy.
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